They Do Exist.

Keeping Romance Alive – by Blair

Editor’s Note: Today’s post was written by Blair, who also wrote “We Don’t Fight” for us last month. It was phenomenal. She and her husband have a marriage I look up to, and I love this short & sweet submission on keeping romance alive. She blogs at and tweets at @heirtoblair. – Lauren

The sun shone through the windows of his pick-up truck, music blaring as he reached over to hold my hand, eyes smiling. My heart thumped.

Before I left for spring break, he slipped me a new pink iPod and a long kiss. A sweet gesture to keep my mind on him while I was away.

I smiled as he walked through the door of my apartment, greeted with candlelight, soft music, and dinner. Our first Valentine’s together.

He brought long-stemmed yellow roses on a Thursday. He knows they’re my favorite.

Our first Christmas together in our home, with champagne & a bed of blankets by the fire, twisting fingers & sighs. Making magic of our own.

After seven years together, my husband & I have experienced quite a few pitter-pats of the heart. The first two years of our courtship were a flurry of late-night dates & cocktails in dim bars. Wild make-out sessions for no good reason on the couch & flowers on bad days. As we exchanged our vows in July 2006, I pictured a life full of secret notes under pillows & daisies on my dresser, sprinkled with quiet candlelight dinners with me in heels & him in a tie.

Oh, to be naive again.

Eventually the honeymoon ends as real life seeps in. Suddenly, my husband is picking up an extra gallon of milk for the baby after work instead of yellow roses. Saturday mornings are a test of patience in feeding & entertaining a toddler, while date nights of high heels & ties are forgotten for mounting gas bills. Life becomes a constant go-go-go mentality with kisses in passing as we trade off the baby & boil spaghetti on the stove.

And then it’s a decision – do I grumble in the monotony of life, or do I delight in the every day, letting my everyday life become a declaration of love?

He vacuums the downstairs on Saturday morning so that I can take a shower. He understands what a hot shower can do for my tired soul.

I fax over his dental paperwork & double-check coverage. Because I know he is up to his ears at work these days.

He borrows my car but returns home with a full tank of gas. So that I won’t have to stop at 7am on Monday morning.

We crawl into bed at 8:30pm, passing the iPad back & forth as we tag-team Angry Birds. It’s good to still laugh together with no expectations.

And sometimes, the sun still shines through the windows of our new family car, music blaring & he reaches over to hold my hand, eyes smiling. He still makes my heart thump..

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55 Responses

  1. Trish Palac

    Beautiful. Definitely a wonderful example of a growing and loving marriage!

    March 18, 2011 at 5:12 pm

  2. Stacy

    Love it! My FI and I have been together for 6 years and I can't wait to start our new life as a family just as you described

    March 18, 2011 at 5:46 pm

  3. jennifer121

    OH, I love this! I say all the time when he presents a full meal for me and the kids – I love him more than if he'd given me roses! It's different. I'm going on 7 years also.

    March 18, 2011 at 5:47 pm

  4. Love this. So beautiful. per usual.

    March 18, 2011 at 6:04 pm

  5. Pingback: Heir to Blair » Keeping the romance alive by redefining romance.

  6. Kimberly

    I agree. Those simple thoughtful moments mean everything! We also try to keep it alive in words. Even just a one-line email at work, or for bigger occasions taking the time to write something meaningful and lasting. Which obviously is something you are doing with this post!

    March 18, 2011 at 6:49 pm

  7. nessarox1403

    Tissue alert! I will keep this in mind as I do dishes and my husband cops a feel as I stand by the sink – we're keeping the love alive! Y'all are a gorgeous couple!

    March 18, 2011 at 6:56 pm

  8. Love this! I agree that we need to learn to appreciate and delight in the everyday things. It's not that special dates and flowers will never happen again, but they'll be fewer and far between than during the dating period. I feel things like vacuuming and filling up a tank of gas have the same love and respect behind them as buying a bouquet of flowers, they're just more practical! It's part of the evolution of a relationship to show love in different ways.

    March 18, 2011 at 7:00 pm

  9. Melissa

    Is this not a basic expectation in a marriage? I hardly think my husband doing a chore so I can take a shower is all that impressive.

    March 18, 2011 at 7:18 pm

  10. Shannon

    bow chica bow wow ;) I love that you love to remember the past and forging ahead as a familiy of three.


    and yes we tag team some angry birds as well. stupid pigs ;)


    March 18, 2011 at 7:19 pm

  11. So lovely!! I recently had to relearn this lesson after 14 years of wedded *bliss*. This IS love and togetherness and intimacy! Congrats on keeping it real, girl!! :)

    March 18, 2011 at 7:24 pm

  12. So very, very sweet. You've captured the tagteam relationship of husband and wife (post baby) so amazingly. Thanks for this!

    March 18, 2011 at 7:41 pm

  13. KCatGU

    On a side note have you had the chance to read "Love Languages" the whole concept is so enlightening. I am guessing your love language maybe 'Acts of Service' Nothing makes a girl feel loved like a folded load of laundry! For my hubs and I, knowing the best way to express love to each other has really helped us. (7 years too) Sometimes a busy body like myself has to really make the effort to sit down spend 'quality time' just catching up with him, and an 'words of affirmation' gal like myself can't stop smiling when he says 'Thank You for getting all the tax info together, you're a lifesaver'

    March 18, 2011 at 8:00 pm

  14. laurenlankford

    earlier today i saw a sign that said, "I LOVE YOU BECAUSE WE HATE ALL THE SAME THINGS." so great.

    March 18, 2011 at 8:03 pm

  15. Ari

    Blair, thank you for this sweet reminder! Flowers are nice, but getting a night off from the dishes or watching him fix something in the house means so much more these days. Love it!

    March 18, 2011 at 8:32 pm

  16. Love it, Blair. :) Sounds very familiar!

    March 19, 2011 at 12:43 am

  17. Mandy

    Sooo…lowering our expectations and being thrilled when our husbands practice basic common courtesies (such as allowing us to bathe) will bring romance back to our marriage? Got it.


    March 19, 2011 at 2:01 am

  18. Amanda

    We do this too! you need to try Fragger also :)

    March 19, 2011 at 3:23 am

  19. Molly

    My mom sent me this because she knows what a hopeless romantic I am! Luckily, I have an equally romantic husband :) I immediately called my husband upstairs so that I could read it to him with tears in my eyes!! This was just what I needed today as I was running off the list to my husband of the list of things we needed to get done today before the work week started all over again….

    March 20, 2011 at 4:48 pm

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