They Do Exist.

It Is About Us

Editor’s Note: Today’s post is by my sweet friend, Haley. She blogs here and tweets at @haleykristine. This month as we share stories about dating, not dating, and trying to date, I want to take a time out and look at this from another perspective. One we’re too often guilty of not seeing. – Lauren

So often I think it is about me. About us. About women.

Probably because I am one.

I think of our broken hearts, shredded and lonely, waiting and wondering if anything but Christ and loneliness will ever live here.

I think of tears cried in the darkness and at empty kitchen tables, and smiles forced over cups of coffee pretending stories of others’ togetherness are simply a source of joy.

I think of how it feels to wonder who and to wonder why and to wonder why no one ever just asks, because you never know unless you ask.

But I rarely consider the responsibility you bear, brother.

I rarely think of what it must be like to be the one to ask the question, to make the first move, as your broken, lonely, shredded heart beats a bit faster as you wonder what she will say.

I rarely think of what it must be like to face the choice of relationship instead of independence, to choose to love another as Christ loves the Church. For the rest of your collective time on this earth.

Brother, that must be so daunting.

I do not know if I could handle that responsibility.

Of course I have my own responsibility to bear in that same agreement, for the rest of our collective time on this earth.

But, brother, I rarely consider your side.

I rarely wonder what you think or feel late at night in the darkness or at empty kitchen tables or over cups of coffee, or perhaps for you it is pints of beer and cigars.

Brother, I am sorry for thinking it is just me, it is just us, just women.

It is about us, men and women, with hearts on the mend, waiting and wondering if anything but Christ and loneliness will ever live here.


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11 Responses

  1. FaithChaser

    This is awesome.

    Thank you.

    February 6, 2012 at 11:24 am

  2. FatherOf4

    It's important to remember (if we believe the Bible) both men and women were built for relationship.

    February 6, 2012 at 11:51 am

  3. Jenny

    Love the last line…."It is about us, men and women, with hearts on the mend, waiting and wondering if anything but Christ and loneliness will ever live here." AMEN so true!

    February 6, 2012 at 1:57 pm

  4. I loved reading this. I've found myself thinking these same things as well. Thank you for sharing it so beautifully.

    February 6, 2012 at 8:28 pm

  5. Suzie

    No words. Amazing.

    February 6, 2012 at 9:10 pm

  6. beautiful, beautiful post. thank you.

    February 8, 2012 at 9:19 pm

  7. leeleegirl4

    I've read this five or six times and I am still just as blown away as I was the first time. This is incredible. I have such a new perspective on dating that I cannot wrap my head around this properly.

    February 20, 2012 at 1:14 pm

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  10. Tamiko

    What a beautiful reminder!

    February 25, 2013 at 12:45 am

  11. Touching post. Love your writing style and your blog overall.

    October 7, 2013 at 10:43 pm

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